Throw the book at Ted Cruz

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With all the news we’ve had over the past week or so, one could be forgiven for missing one particular little news morsel guaranteed to give Democrats (and everyone with a brain) a little laugh.

An announcement has been made. It concerns a certain person who declared he will likely be running for President of the United States. Only not in the 2024 election. Nope. This person is saving themselves for us and is planning to run sometime in the future. This person has a comedic flair that has distinguished itself in political history.

You see, this person provokes lots of laughs — only people laugh AT him, not with him. He has given much fodder to professional comedians everywhere. Who is this mysterious politician who is ACHING to run again? (Yes-he has run before.)

Who is this incredibly stupid man who thinks he might have a chance? Who is this fool who is the butt of many a joke and who describes running for president as “the most fun I’ve ever had in my life?”

Add on–this man was laughed at and derided during his entire run which, if he is serious about it being “the most fun,” tells a sad tale of what his life is like. More hints – this man LOVES to screw over his constituents by bailing on them when they need him the most.

This man has let insurrectionist Trump insult his wife. This fool also has a penchant for mariachi music and Cancun. And if you guessed Ted Cruz, congrats! You know your politics. Mariachi Ted (a fool, insurrection party, poor Texas) made this stunning declaration in an interview to promote his new book: “Unwoke: How to Defeat Cultural Marxism in America.”

Such a profound title! I suspect this book will be yet another one that languishes in the one-dollar pile. Mr Mariachi man said he did not run this cycle because it did not feel “right.” (Decoded, that means Donald Trump would have been mad at him.)

So let us break down this amazing announcement together, yes? It would be a truly lovely thing to see Ted Run. He’d be the punch line on EVERY comedic show. This could be good!

“We came within inches of winning,” Cruz bragged in this interview, showing that the words lying and Ted still go together like two peas in a pod. “I fully hope and expect to run again at some point,” the clueless Ted exclaimed.

So there you have it! Down the line, we will have to deal with a Presidential run by Teddy himself, who is cruising for a bruising if he thinks he can actually win ANYTHING but the title of most unlikeable Senator ever.

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