There’s something wrong with Kristi Noem

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Puppy murderer and South Dakota governor Kristi Noem brags in her new book that she met the North Korean dictator Kim Jong-un. This has been dismissed by experts as “bullshit.” There’s no chance that it happened, and Noem, a confirmed psychopath, clearly made the whole thing up.

Noem writes in her political memoir, “Through my tenure on the House armed services committee [2011-2018], I had the chance to travel to many countries to meet with world leaders. I remember when I met with North Korean dictator Kim Jong-un. I’m sure he underestimated me, having no clue about my experience staring down little tyrants.” She then adds parenthetically (and bizarrely), “I’d been a children’s pastor, after all.” I guess she thinks the same of kids as she does puppies.

Anyway, it’s a common feature of narcissists to invent fantastical stories in which they are the hero. Noem’s claim has been shouted down by experts across Washington DC. Noem should have known better than to make up such an obvious lie. But then, Noem is also stupid, like most Republicans.

Noem also claims in her book to have cancelled a meeting with French president Emmanuel Macron. She writes of being in Paris “slated to meet” the French president when, “… the day before we were to meet [Macron] made what I considered a very pro-Hamas and anti-Israel comment to the press. So, I decided to cancel. There is no place for pro-Hamas rhetoric.” This is also a lie, created to make Noem look like a woman of both importance and principles. Macron’s office says no direct invitation to Noem was ever issued.

Less substantial is the rumour that Noem also invented the story about the time she dragged her puppy and a goat to a gravel pit and murdered them both with a gun. It turns out that this story was already well-known in political circles, but the true details are far more disturbing.

According to the rumour the story goes that Noem murdered the animals not out of “reluctant compassion” but in a fit of uncontrollable, frenzied rage. Several people witnessed the incident, including numerous construction workers. All who saw it were deeply shocked by the wanton fury with which this out-of-control lunatic slaughtered both animals. The theory is that the incident, as it actually happened, was so awful and so disturbing that Noem included a tamer, watered down version of the event in her book in an effort to get ahead of the story and diffuse its potential impact.

In short, Kristi Noem is a lying psychopath with no morals. That is, a garden variety 21st century Republican. And, as ever, ladies and gentlemen, brothers and sisters, comrades and friends, stay safe.

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