The real reason Donald Trump’s goons are all holed up in Italy right now

It’s like a movie script that’s so cliched, it gets rejected for being too simplistically on-the-nose. The perpetrators of a massive criminal conspiracy and coverup at the highest levels of government have been caught in the act, and so they’re all fleeing the country under cover of darkness, and they’re all holed up in the same overseas bunker. Except in this instance the “bunker” is probably a spaghetti restaurant, and the perpetrators are idiots.

As of tonight we have confirmation that Attorney General Bill Barr, Secretary of State Mike Pompeo, and human garbage dump Sebastian Gorka are all in Italy. We also have confirmation that Pompeo and Gorka traveled there together today. And we have confirmation that Barr has been there the past several days in an attempt at conspiring with foreign governments in the hope of spinning Donald Trump’s scandals in Trump’s favor. But what do these goons hope to accomplish together?

We have a few other pieces of the puzzle. The Trump White House threw Pompeo under the bus today by confirming that he participated in Donald Trump’s fateful phone call with the president of Ukraine. Barr told the AP over the weekend that he was “angry” that Trump had outed his role in the Ukraine plot. So if Pompeo and Barr have one thing in common right now, it’s that Trump is actively incriminating them both, and at least one of them is openly ticked off about it. We assume Gorka is with them for comic relief.

The bottom line is that as things fall apart for Donald Trump, and as Donald Trump falls apart accordingly, he keeps implicating and incriminating his own people in real time. Whatever these Trump goons are doing in Italy right now, it surely centers around how to save themselves as Trump circles the drain.