Donald Trump is terrified

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“All this bravado and everything else,” former New Jersey governor and presidential candidate Chris Christie recently said of Donald Trump on MSNBC, “I’ve known him for 22 years, when I was doing these cases in New Jersey and I would put political figures in jail, he would say to me ‘I could never do that, I could never go to jail.’ And I’m telling you, no matter what he says, no matter how he’s bragging and going on and on about him not being afraid, he goes to bed every night thinking about the sound of that jail cell door closing behind him.”

I think Chris Christie is right. I think Donald Trump is terrified of going to jail. What’s more, a major part of Trump’s waking day is also spent finding ways to encourage himself that he’s not headed for prison, desperately seeking out little islands of relief in an ocean of misery. And because Trump is a narcissist, there are very few people, quite possibly no one, in whom he can confide his terror.

So what are his options? No doubt he considers them every day, and they are few. Can he make a plea bargain? Even though he has publicly stated that he will never strike a plea deal, such rhetoric means nothing to Trump. Going back on his word is a preprinted item on his daily todo list.

But are plea deals even available? What does he have that he could possibly offer the government? He would betray anyone, including his own children, to stay out of jail. But the government doesn’t need another cooperating witness. Besides, he’s the man at the top. There is no one else higher up that he can rat out. And he’s now indicted in four jurisdictions, which means he would have to find a way to make four separate plea deals.

So, practically speaking, plea deals are probably out. Suicide is out, too. Narcissists occasionally threaten suicide, but they never go through with it. And I doubt Trump would threaten suicide, but I’m not 100 percent sure of that. Anyway, suicide is off the table even though existential suicide may not be. It’s a miracle of modern medical science that he’s still alive after that execrable diet of his.

Contrary to popular belief, it would be very difficult for him to flee justice in Trump Force One, what Trump pretentiously calls his Boeing 757-200 jet aircraft. The aircraft does not possess the range — 3,900 nautical miles (7,220 km; 4,490 mi) — to cross the Atlantic Ocean, and certainly not the Pacific Ocean. He could not use it to flee nonstop to any likely country such as Russia or North Korea. Those countries are not in range.

However, that would not prevent some wealthy friend with a jet with a superior range from helping him. But that would entail breaking serious laws, and is there anyone still available who is stupid enough to stick their neck that far out for Donald Trump? Perhaps.

In any case, fleeing justice is also not the narcissistic way. It’s too much an admission of failure and would take him too far out of the limelight. Going from president of the United States to a fugitive from justice — like Robert Vesco or Roman Polanski — would be very hard for Trump to take. Possibly even worse than jail.

No, I think Trump’s worst case scenario is a cosy incarceration at Mar-a-Lago with an ankle bracelet, and possibly occasional weekend furloughs. That’s probably Trump being unrealistic. He no doubt believes he’s too rich and too famous to go to actual jail. Well, Paris Hilton thought the same thing.

Whatever Trump is scheming right now, you can bet he’s extremely uncomfortable. He may even be privately full of self-recriminations about his attempts to steal the election, though he’d never admit that. Likelier still, he’s probably full of murderous fury at one or more persons in his inner circle that he blames for his current predicament.

Whatever the details, Donald Trump is a very unhappy man. Let that be another aspect of our sweet, sweet justice. There are many more to come. And, as ever, ladies and gentlemen, brothers and sisters, comrades and friends, stay safe.

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