WHERE’S RUDY?

With his criminal co-conspirators having been arrested, his bank records having been reportedly examined by the Feds, and witnesses lining up around the block to tell the House impeachment inquiry about his crimes, all eyes are on Rudy Giuliani to see what his next move will be. Except our eyes aren’t on him.

Rudy Giuliani, a perpetual motormouth who never met a problem he didn’t think he could fix by blabbering about it, has gone and disappeared from public view. We can’t read much into his disappearance from TV airwaves alone, as it’s possible that legitimate cable news hosts have finally decided he’s too bonkers to keep booking, and his friends on TV are trying to protect him from himself at this point.

But it’s not just a television thing. Rudy, who had been defiantly tweeting several times per day as his Ukraine scandal was exploding, has now gone forty-eight hours without tweeting anything at all. Normally, when the Feds are closing in and the target suddenly goes quiet, it means their lawyer smartly told them to shut up and stop making thing worse. But one of the last things Rudy tweeted before going quiet was “At this time, I do not need a lawyer.” So there’s no one advising him on anything at this point.

To be clear, we don’t think Rudy Giuliani has fled the country or anything. Considering how adeptly the Feds were able to pick up Rudy’s associates while they were trying to flee, there’s clearly some kind electronic surveillance going on. So if Rudy tried to flee, they’d surely pick him up, and we’d all promptly hear about it. Instead, it looks like he’s simply hiding under his bed and pretending he’s not about to be arrested. When an eternal motormouth like Rudy Giuliani has been scared into silence, you know he knows he’s in trouble.

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