Bon voyage, Ted Cruz!

Palmer Report articles are all 100% free to read, with no forced subscriptions and nothing hidden behind paywalls. If you value our content, you're welcome to pay for it:
Pay $5 to Palmer Report:
Pay $25 to Palmer Report:
Pay $75 to Palmer Report:

Sign up for the Palmer Report Mailing List.

When writing, it is a lot of fun to indulge in the art of metaphors. I do this frequently, along with using similes and analogies. Many writers do this, and it is fun. This does not mean that we always get it right, of course.

But because I indulge in this method of writing, I do like to lend extra tolerance when it comes to other people doing the same — even when they’re not writers. Even when they’re politicians. Only sometimes I can’t. Sometimes the truth must be told.

And the truth is, an analogy has just been used. It’s been used by a (not) popular Senator who has a history of making terrible decisions and saying very bizarre things. Only this latest is out there even for him.

Who is this Senator who used the English language in such an abominable way? Why it’s Rafael Cruz, of course. Who else could it be? The Texas Senator is currently the object of scorn and bewilderment on Twitter. He also, I suspect, will be starring in the nightmares of many people in the days to come.

On his podcast, Verdict, Ted Cruz was lost in fond memories — of the “girls gone wild” series. I know. It is disgusting, isn’t it? He made an analogy — a very creepy one.

“Liberals gone wild!!” On the air, Ted Cruz said that the girls’ gone wild videos reminded him of AOC and Elizabeth Warren.

“This is Liberals gone wild. This is the crazy left that — this is AOC and Elizabeth Warren.”

“Not in bikinis.”

“But embracing their socialist nuttiness.”

“Like someone sat down at a bar and said, how much crazy crap can we do?”

Yes, there will be Cruz nightmares galore. It is inevitable.

Reactions?

“Mangled metaphor.” This is from the article I linked to in the Independent.

Reactions online?

“Weird online freak.”

“Creep.”

“Degenerate.”

“OMG, what a loser.”

“Does he know the girl’s gone wild founder was arrested?”

There goes my breakfast.”

“WHAT?”

“Stay classy, Teddy.”

“I’m sure he had a full subscription.”

“Ummmm..”

“How does he know about girls gone wild?”


My advice to Rafael is to, perhaps under the cover of darkness, delete his Twitter account, stay away from the “mangled metaphors” and perhaps — only perhaps — do some actual work.

Palmer Report articles are all 100% free to read, with no forced subscriptions and nothing hidden behind paywalls. If you value our content, you're welcome to pay for it:
Pay $5 to Palmer Report:
Pay $25 to Palmer Report:
Pay $75 to Palmer Report:

Sign up for the Palmer Report Mailing List.
Write for the Palmer Report Community Section.